Elder abuse is unfortunately very common: a national 2015 study suggests that 7.5% or nearly 700,000 older adults in Canada experience some form of elder abuse each year. For those working in elder care settings, or providing support to an older loved one, it can be common to hear about financial abuse, neglect, or even physical abuse of older adults. Sexual violence, on the other hand, is a pervasive issue in the older adult community that is rarely discussed. Supporting older adults who have experienced sexual violence, then, starts with acknowledging that it happens, and making space for people to recognize and talk about their experiences.
A recent Alberta-wide survey found that 1 in 2 people experience some form of sexual abuse in their lifetime. This means that we all know someone impacted by sexual abuse, whether they’ve told us about it or not. It’s also important to consider that 1 in 3 people who took this survey reported experiencing sexual abuse before the age of 18. This shows us that, while people can and do experience sexual violence in their older adult years, it’s also common for many people, including seniors or older adults, to carry experiences of sexual abuse from their childhood, youth, and early adulthood.
There are many barriers that may prevent an older adult from coming forward about an experience of sexual abuse:
Another factor that comes into play on this issue is that many of us hold ageist beliefs that make it difficult to recognize when elder sexual abuse is happening. As an example, there’s a common assumption that older adults do not have sexual and/or romantic desires and are therefore not at risk of being sexually abused. In reality, many older adults have healthy and fulfilling sex lives.
Even more importantly, sexual assault is about power and control, not sexual desire. It’s a common myth that sexual assault happens because someone felt “too turned on” and couldn’t control themselves. Sexual assault actually happens because someone wants to have power and control over another person, and they use sexual acts to get that power and control.
It can be very hard for people to disclose that they have experienced sexual abuse, whether the abuse happened recently or in the past. It’s common for those who have experienced abuse in their childhood, teenage years, or early adulthood to not talk about these experiences until later in their life. It’s important that people receive a supportive response to a disclosure of sexual abuse no matter when they reach out for help. It’s also important for people to know that it’s never too late to receive support or to heal from abuse.
Listening without judgement can help people feel comfortable, safe, and supported.
Many people who experience sexual violence worry they will not be believed, and many people who reach out for help following sexual abuse are not met with a supportive response. Not being believed can have very damaging impacts on healing, which is why you should show that you believe the person through both your words and actions. The following statements often have a positive impact:
People can respond to traumatic events in ways that might be confusing for supporters. Keep in mind that there is no wrong way for someone to be feeling, or for someone to respond, following an experience of sexual abuse.
As well, even though it is extremely rare for people to lie about sexual violence, it is common for people of all ages to have trouble remembering the details of the abuse. It is so important to believe people when they reach out for help following sexual abuse, even if they do not have clear or complete memories about the abuse.
Here are a few important things to note about asking questions:
When someone experiences sexual abuse their power and autonomy is temporarily taken away; whenever we are supporting someone we want to look for opportunities where this person can have control over their life and their healing.
It’s incredibly important for the person who has experienced abuse to decide who they share the information with, when they share it, and for them to be able to share it in their own words. Be respectful of people’s right to privacy and confidentiality.
People of all ages deserve to be supported in an empowering way that centers their voice, experiences, and needs. Respect their autonomy and their ability to make decisions that are right for themselves, even if that means they don’t want to access any resources.
Rather than telling the person what you think they should do following an experience of sexual violence, it is better to explore the options that are available to them. Providing options (rather than advice) is important as it allows the individual to decide what happens next on their healing journey. Some options include:
If someone is over the age of 18 there is no legal obligation to report known or suspected abuse, unless you know or suspect that an adult who receives publicly funded care or support services is at risk of abuse. If you have questions or concerns about reporting the abuse of an older adult, please contact the Protection for Persons in Care Information and Reporting Line:
1.888.357.9339
780.422.1155
alberta.ca
Other important things to keep in mind about reporting abuse to the police:
Access from any ER in the Edmonton Zone
For more options for support and information, visit our Community Resources page.
The improper exposure of a child to any sexual contact, activity, or behaviour. This includes all sexual touching, the invitation to touch, exhibitionism, exposure to pornography.
Forcing another individual, through violence, threats (physical or emotional), pressure, deception, guilt, to engage in sexual activities against their will.
A voluntary agreement between 2 or more people to engage in sexual activity. Consent must be clear, informed, voluntary, sober, act and person-specific, ongoing, mutual, active, and come directly from the individuals engaging in the sexual contact. It is impossible to get consent from children, though close-in-age and peer-experimentation exceptions exist for youth ages 12-15.
A society or environment in which obtaining consent and respecting boundaries is the norm, for both sexual contact and everyday activities.
The advocacy of women’s rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes.
An intersectional approach to service delivery that acknowledges that the root of sexual violence is power inequality and works to reduce barriers that groups and individuals face when seeking support and volunteer or employment opportunities.
When an intimate photo or video is shared or taken without the voluntary consent (read consent definition above) of the person in the photo or video (Source: savedmonton.com)
Person-first language recognizes that a person is more than any one experience and that labels are sometimes harmful. People who have experienced sexual violence may use terms like victim or survivor to describe themselves, or they may use words like offender or perpetrator to describe the person who harmed them. Terms that resonate for one person may not fit for another person for a variety of reasons, and SACE supports a person’s right to self-determine their identity and experience. This is why at SACE, we default to person-first language such as “person who experienced sexual assault”, or “person who used abusive behavior”, unless speaking with or about an individual who has identified how they would like their experience to be talked about.
A society or environment whose prevailing social attitudes have the effect of normalizing or trivializing sexual assault and abuse.
Sex trafficking is a form of sexual exploitation. Human trafficking for the purposes of sexual exploitation is a crime and Canada has specific legislation in the Criminal Code (S. 279) and in the IRPA (Immigrant and Refugee Protection Action) (S. 117 & 118) to address all types of human trafficking (sexual exploitation, labour exploitation, organ, debt servitude) There are three elements to constitute human trafficking: Action + Means + Purpose.
Sexual abuse is most often used to refer to Child Sexual Abuse. To learn more about this, read the definition above or our section on Child Sexual Abuse.
Any form of sexual contact without voluntary consent, including unwanted: oral contact (kissing); sexual touching; oral-genital contact; and/or vaginal or anal penetration.
Any actual or attempted abuse of a position of vulnerability, differential power, or trust, for sexual purposes, including, but not limited to, profiting monetarily, socially or politically from the sexual exploitation of another.
Any unwanted comment, gesture, or action that is sexual in nature that makes someone feel afraid, embarrassed, uncomfortable or ashamed. The intention of the person doing the action doesn’t matter, it’s the negative impact the action has that makes something sexual harassment.
Sexual violence is an umbrella term that refers to any form of non-consensual sexual behavior, including sexual assault, sexual abuse, sexual harassment, sexual exploitation, sex trafficking, and sexual violence facilitated through technology.
SACE has also created a digital one-pager for service providers on the subject of sexual violence and older adults, available for download.
Access from any ER in the Edmonton Zone
For more options for support and information, visit our Community Resources page.